Chef Paul Prudhomme, the guy who does that Cajun or Creole food or whatever the fuck that shit is down there, got shot the other day. Really not shot. They think a falling bullet just landed on the guy's arm. No real injury and it seems to be a pretty innocent mistake. Prudhomme was setting up to cook outdoors at a golf tournament when he was grazed by a .22 caliber bullet -- apparently from a hunter. But if you ask me, it could have been anyone using ammunition from these idiots.

But however the fuck it happened is no matter. No one should be fucking surprised that he got hit. With all due respect to Chef Prudhomme, he's a pretty fucking big target, yes? But I like the guy -- he seems like a good bloke.

Why couldn't the situation have been different? Like maybe instead of a single falling bullet it was a rapid-fire spray of 800 rounds from a high-powered machine gun at close range. And instead of Prudhomme, why couldn't the target have been, I don't fucking know, any host on the Food Network, riddling their bodies with countless holes of...

Oopsie! Look at the time. Gotta run to my fucking mindfulness meditation class.