I went to a Mets game the other day, and when I took a break to use the restrooom, I saw one of those Dippin' Dots carts, where girls were standing in dirty aprons and swatting away flies. The ice cream had all melted into regular ice cream, which I'm guessing is ice cream of the past.
Have you seen their logo? It says "ice cream of the future." Yeah, right. If Dippin' Dots is the ice cream of the future, then Gavin Rossdale is still the most talented musician I know. Do you know how long they've been saying it's the ice cream of the future? They've been saying this for a long time, and Dippin' Dots are still the same, they're still overpriced, and they still melt into one big clump as soon as you walk off. Plus - and this is the biggest argument here - how many other ice cream companies have converted into dots? Huh? Think about it people!
Below are some ideas I have for new slogans for Dippin' Dots - add your own in the comment section.
- Dippin' Dots: You're Gonna Need a Ten-Dollar Bill
- Dippin' Dots: Very, Very Thin Napkins Included to Clean Up What Will Be a Very Messy Treat
- Dippin' Dots: In The Freezer, They Actually Are Really Dots
- Dippin' Dots: If You Want More Than 3 Flavors And/Or You Want Ice Cream on a Cone, Keep Walking
- Dippin' Dots: Not as Expensive as Beer at a Ballpark
Gordon Ramsay:
Dippin' Dots: Still More Popular Than John Mayer!
7/10/2008 3:58 PMAnn Coulter:
I had a gig with maxim, does that make me a whore?
7/12/2008 3:07 PMAnn Coulter:
I've also just started to offer my ass for free on-line. Does that make me a whore? Remember, I don't charge a thing. I should add that, to date, I haven't had any takers. So, I repeat, does that make me a whore?
11/9/2008 10:50 AMJohn Mayer:
Fuck you Gordon Ramsay and your mediocre lame ass extra gig on the lifetime channel.
Seriously, who the fuck watches lifetime?
And you're not even the lead fucking chef you're just one of those odds and ends in the background putting chicken roasts in the oven and shit.
The other day my daughter cooked a damn turkey. And she's fucking 10! Shows how much talent it takes to get a stint on Lifetime.
And Coulter, don't even get me fucking started.
7/12/2008 3:10 PMgatersaw:
Dippin' Dots; the Al Gore of US presidency.
7/18/2008 9:52 AMNikkerZ (Nikki Marie):
Culver's Custard Style Ice Cream. Cookie Dough topping, little hot fudge, whip cream and cherries.....THIS is the most heavenly thing you've ever tasted other than a John Mayer Sundae....
7/21/2008 10:56 PMbank of america ex employee:
please more anti dippin dots slogans.
8/19/2008 3:17 PMWill Smith:
John, you should stop molesting children, its starting to show in your personality!
10/3/2008 7:05 PMAmy Winehouse:
Dippin' Dots: When I mix them with Rémy Martin and ketamine, I wake up in all kinds of fun places!
11/9/2008 2:03 AMBill Clinton:
Dippin' Dots: The ice cream with all the balls and a little cream.
4/6/2009 12:04 PM