Whoa you guys! Sorry about that earthquake that just happened – I swear I didn’t mean to do that!

Seriously, I was as surprised as y’all were when I accidentally caused that earthquake. Alls I was doin’ was lookin’ for a new goldfish at the pet store, ‘cause all my other ones are frickin’ stupid so I just flushed ‘em down the crapper. LOL! But I looked at that damn fish tank for literally like a hundred years, and I couldn’t find any goldfish there that I wanted; all of ‘em looked mean, and the last thing I need is some pissed off goldfish in my home, giving me drama.

So I was already ticked off, and then I swear I saw two of them laughing at me. I think they were the ringleaders of all the other goldfish, so then the others started laughing at me too. I’m sure you guys know how embarrassing it is when there’s a whole tank of goldfish laughing at you. Anyway, I got so mad that all the sudden everything around me started shaking, and it went on for at least like half a minute. When I went outside there were sirens goin' off and everything, and then later when I heard this was the biggest earthquake LA has had in over 12 years, I was like, “I did that? Dang!”

Hope you’re not mad at me :(