Well, we just wrapped up our USA tour, and I can't say how happy I am. The tour dirigible stinks of soybean oil, Phil's fungus-encrusted socks, and the incense I've been lighting to honor the Tibetans and Georgians who were massacred while the rest of the world watched 16-year-olds jump around on a balance beam. If Jonny tells me about one more Croatian composer of early-electronic music who was unjustly ignored by history, I'm going to strangle his pale neck.
And the songs. Always the same bloody songs night after night. We really only have five albums to pick songs off of (our first two albums being, in my humble opinion, dreadful hunks of donkey shit, almost as bad as an Oasis album), and that means we end up playing, for instance, "Everything in its Right Place," twenty-seven times in thirty days. Now, that isn't quite my idea of hell, because it in no way involves Margaret Thatcher, but it's awfully close.
I really don't know how the Rolling Stones keep up their touring, after all these years. I suppose love of money can take you a long way, but I don't have their drive.
The worst part of touring, however, isn't the traveling conditions, or the mind-numbing repetition, or even going into the bathroom right after Phil uses it. It's the fact that, every time I go to America, I'm reminded that its inhabitants are stark raving bloody lunatics who are two hundred pounds overweight, believe that God is helping them find a good parking place, or, more usually, both. When I'm at home, I can at least pretend that those are unjust stereotypes, but the truth is Americans are a good deal uglier and crazier than the rest of the world gives them credit for.
Not all Americans are terrible people, I should clarify. Neil Young was American, and he wrote some pretty good songs, one of which we just covered in this video. Ah, I'm being told he was actually Canadian. So I guess I take that back about not all Americans being terrible.
Barack Obama:
Well, it's time for a CHANGE in America.
9/3/2008 5:21 PMSamuel L. Jackson:
This motherfucker is bitch-blogging again? Does anybody know who this fuckwad is or where he/she lives? I think I shall bring the gates of hell down upon this whining, even more talentless than Travolta, cocksucker. I said I'll see you soon motherfucker.
9/3/2008 6:16 PMFlavor Flav:
FLAVOR-FLAVVVVVVVVVVV
YEAH BOIIIIIIIIIIII
9/5/2008 10:47 PMThom Yorke:
:(
9/21/2008 7:51 AMelias da silva benedito:
biografia do Jesus Americano
O Jesus Americano nasceu das composições de um certo Elias da Silva Benedito,em Santa Isabel,interior de São Paulo.Elias havia tocado em diversas bandas na cidade desde 1997,mas infelizmente ele causava embaraço em meia-dúzia de roqueiros puritanos da cidade.Ele não era aceito por alguns punks por ser nojento demais,e nem aceito pelos normais,por ser comum demais.Também não se encaixava em bandas com bons músicos,pois fatalmente bandas assim sempre só tocam covers de ''classic rocks''(nome patético).Elias não queria saber de The Doors ou Creedence..Ele queria mesmo era tocar suas próprias músicas,vomitar as influências dos Pixies,dos bluseiros,dos grunges e do gospel americano.Até que um dia ,ele espertamente se uniu com outro baixinho motoboy da cidade,Elton,conhecido por lá como Tékinho.E apenas com um violão Tonante herdado do pai miserável,uma bateria tosca e um pedal velho de overdrive,tocaram de 2003 à 2008,quando então enjoaram um pouco e resolveram dar uma parada depois de um show onde Elias após tocar ''Saddam Hussein'',quebra seu violão em pedaços e chama todo mundo em Santa Isabel de cusão.Depois disso,sabendo que a mesma meia-dúzia de rockers de sempre iriam fazer sua fama da pior maneira possível na city(pelo menos é uma forma de propaganda grátis,hehehe),Elias fez o dever de casa direitinho,como ensinava os titios Stones,''falem mal,mas falem de mim'',tornando-se um maldito feliz da vida e por enquanto mantendo o Jesus Americano vivo na internet e em gravações clandestinas espalhadas por todo o Vale do Paraíba.Por enquanto.,Elias grava sozinho a bateria,o baixo e guitarra numa nova demo intitulada ''SONS DA GUERRA''.Como dizia o Lobão,''foda-se a gravadora''!
influências:pixies,grunges em geral,punk 77,padre marcelo rossi,bluseiros do início do século xx,lautreamont flaws.
please,tom,hear my music in:jesus americano.arteblog.com.br
2/1/2009 12:06 PMAl Gore:
I invented Thom Yorke.
10/10/2008 4:37 PMDonald Trump:
And I invented NEW York. What's your point, ass?
10/10/2008 9:09 PMBono:
A visit to Africa might do you some good, Thommy boy.
10/20/2008 5:00 PMDalai Lama:
Good support In Mexico city.
3/17/2009 1:27 AM